Thursday, December 31, 2009

Holiday Post #11: A cup of kindness yet

Should auld acquaintance be forgot,
and never brought to mind ?
Should auld acquaintance be forgot,
and days o'auld lang syne ?

For auld lang syne, my jo,
for auld lang syne,
we’ll tak a cup o’ kindness yet,
for auld lang syne.

And surely ye’ll be your pint-stowp !
and surely I’ll be mine !
And we’ll tak a cup o’ kindness yet,
for auld lang syne.

We twa hae run about the braes,
and pu’d the gowans fine ;
But we’ve wander’d mony a weary foot,
sin auld lang syne.

For auld lang syne, my jo,
for auld lang syne,
we’ll tak a cup o’ kindness yet,
for auld lang syne.

We twa hae paidl’d i' the burn,
frae morning sun till dine ;
But seas between us braid hae roar’d
sin auld lang syne.

For auld lang syne, my jo,
for auld lang syne,
we’ll tak a cup o’ kindness yet,
for auld lang syne.

And there’s a hand, my trusty fiere !
and gie's a hand o’ thine !
And we’ll tak a right gude-willy waught,
for auld lang syne.

For auld lang syne, my jo,
for auld lang syne,
we’ll tak a cup o’ kindness yet,
for auld lang syne.

Burns Night is coming! 25 January 2010

And be sure to vote before midniight tonight... right now it's down to Heidi Klum, Sarah Michelle Gellar, & Adriana Lima.

Monday, December 28, 2009

Holiday Post #10: Vote or Die

As it stands right now, w/ 3 1/2 days to go, Heidi Samuel (née Klum) has 2 votes, Adriana Lima has 1 vote & Sarah Michelle Gellar has 4. Stephanie... Kristen... Rachel... Erin... Joe... Dan & everyone else who hasn't cast a vote yet, we're counting on you to undo this SMG landslide so get voting! We'll be announcing the winner @ 12:01AM Eastern Time on January 1st, so vote w/in the next 3 days or forever hold your peace.

Friday, December 25, 2009

Holiday Post #9: Eve & Morning

After working @ both 2nd jobs yesterday, I made it home around 6:00ish & we enjoyed a fantastic Tofurkey dinner that couldn't be beat. Stephanie made Yorkshire pudding to go w/ it & then we watched a couple X-Mas cartoons (Smurfs & Mickey's X-Mas Carol) before the season 2 finale for Lost. After the kids went to bed we enjoyed Little Women while doing the Santa stuff.Isaiah seemed to completely understand what was going on as he kept looking @ the tree & saying "ho ho ho." He was then up all night, & Stephanie woke me up @ 6:00 because she couldn't wait any longer to watch the kids open their stuff.
Solstice: Guitar, Hannah Montana video game, Grease sweatshirt
Aiden: Batman book, FIFA '09, Lost Via Domus
Isaiah: Woody doll w/ pull string, Little People school bus, dog puzzle

They seem to have had a good X-Mas, but it's certainly not over yet. We're off to Stephanie's mom's in a few minutes, some old friends of my family tomorrow evening, & then my parents' Sunday afternoon. Hopefully I'll get a chance to see Jason & make the Season 2 - Season 3 switch w/ Daye this week too. And while we're on the topic of upcoming events, the voting has fallen off a bit... a few people still need to cast their votes... so get on it! It seems like Sarah Michelle Gellar might win this year, so we certainly can't let those numbers stand.

Wednesday, December 23, 2009

Holiday Post #8: Happy Festivus

My parents came over last night & we watched "The Strike," the Seinfeld episode about Festivus. It was nice way to spend Festivus Eve, & after work tonight, we'll have us another Festivus dinner that can't be beat... & then the Airing of Grievances. While I'm out & about today, I may pick up an aluminum pole.... & then I may start looking into the votes o cast yours if you ahven't already (scroll down).

Thursday, December 17, 2009

Holiday Post #7: The New Song... as Promised

I mentioned last week that the song was in the works. I'm done w/ grading & taking a break from my other jobs (Nicola's, Plum, & working on that little Sherlock Holmes article) to tell you all the song is finished. It's fun little number for the whole family... as long as your family includes kissing cousins... but I almost offended myself. The only real defense for this thing is 2-fold: 1) Stephanie requested a song referencing "Christmas thongs" so we can blame her & 2) it's not offensive, it's clever. Imagine it as an upbeat swing number w/ the ocal styings of someone like Dean Martin or maybe Crosby (Bing not David). Oh, & in case you forgot, here's the link to my previous holiday ditty. After you read the lyrics, don't forget to croll down and cast youur vote!

“A Swingin’ Christmas Time”

This Christmas everyone is comin’
We’ll have fun with ho ho hos
Inside our fire’s warm and hummin’
Underneath the mistletoe

In honor of the Christmas season
We’re gonna play a Christmas tune
It’s hot in here but outside it is freezin’
Santa’s smilin’ wide and comin’ soon.

We’re gonna have a swingin’ Christmas
We’re naked underneath the tree
We’re gonna have a swingin’ Christmas
You & you & you & you & me

So trim your tree and trim your bush
It’s time to shine your Festivus pole
Now dance around and shake your tush
We decked the mantel with an empty fishbowl

In honor of the Christmas season
A Christmas carol just for you.
Although one-on-one can be pleasin',
This holiday we'll try few-on-few

We’re gonna have a swingin’ Christmas
We’re naked underneath the tree
We’re gonna have a swingin’ Christmas
You & you & you & you & me

So if you want to have a Christmas to remember
Take off your shirts and make the Yule Tide gay
Or gently wrap your hands around my member,
Then go and wash your white Christmas away.

In honor of the Christmas season
We’re gonna sing a Christmas song
Drink up and let’s abandon rhyme and reason
Drop your pants and drop your Christmas thong

We’re gonna have a swingin’ Christmas
We’re naked underneath the tree
We’re gonna have a swingin’ Christmas
You & you & you & you & me

Wednesday, December 16, 2009

Holiday Post #6: The Films (part 1?)

Last year we watched White Christmas & Holiday Inn. Both are fun as Hell, but they both suck ass as far as plot & character development are concerned. Funnier, but just as shitty was last night's viewing of National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation. I know there are some readers of this blog who love the shit out of this film... & there is a lot of it to love, but I just don't get it. The 1st 2 Vacation movies are great, but this never did it for me. I saw it in the theater when it was new w/ my friends Marques & Melanie (I don't recall them liking it either), but I hadn't seen it since. I left the theater in December of 1989 wishing I could get my 5 bucks back. Then the other night, an ad made me laugh so I recorded it & we watched it. It's got it funny moments, but over-all, it doesn't work. The jokes are re-hashed from the 1st movie, & they really seem forced. The plot kept us asking "why doesn't he just...?" I mean, come on... trying to get ahead of the crazy pick-up truck? Staying stuck in the attic after he fell through once? The light switch? Maybe it'll be another 20 years before I go for it again. I bet the kids would like it though. (Stephanie appreciated the 3 Stooges-esque violence though.)Speaking of the kids, we watched a couple movies w/ them this week. Jingle All the Way, which is miles much better than Christmas Vacation. Of course, we watched it over the summer too as part of the Schwarzeneggerathon. Sinbad is as bad as I imagine Sinbad always is, but Arnold's comic timing is quite good. other than A different world, I don't think I've ever seen anything w/ Sinbad, & judging from his performances in Jingle All the Way & A Different World, that is a fine decision.We also had the 1st viewing of A Christmas Story. I saw it in the theater @ Fairlane Town Center when I was 9, & have loved it ever since. There's not much to say since we've all seen it a million times. I can say this about movies @ Fairlane though: as a child, I went there a few time a year. I saw Flash Gordon, Clash of the Titans, The Black Stallion, Santa Clause: The Movie, Ghostbusters, & A View to a Kill there. I've watched most of these recently, & for the most part, they hold up well. I had the same experience w/ Santa Clause: The Movie that I had w/ Christmas Vacation though. I was 11 years old & wanted my parents to get their money back. Also like Christmas Vacation, I've only seen it once since. Why was Dudley Moore famous?Last week, we watched the George C. Scott Christmas Carol. I haven't seen the Alastair Sim version in years, so my comparison is a bit flawed, but I really like the George C. Scott version a lot. I watched it on TV when it was new & it scared the shit out of me. We also had to read the script in my 7th grade English class (we also read a script for Murder She Wrote... I still don't know why), & it had a picture of the Ghost of Christmas Present w/ his robe open & the two creepy kids (Ignorance & Want) inside. That freaked me out then too. I like the Patrick Stewart version as well... & Mickey's Christmas Carol is a good animated one, but I think I'll have to check out the Alister Sim 1 if it's on this year.If we watch anything else, you can bet on it getting a post & I'll be sure to write about the television specials we watch this year too. & you need to do your part & scroll down to vote in the Visions of Ypsi Celebrity M.I.L.F. of the Year Contest!

Monday, December 14, 2009

Holiday Post #5: And the Nominees are...

The Rules:
We @ Visions of Ypsi are proud to present the 6th Annual Celebrity M.I.L.F. of the Year Contest. Before you vote, however, be sure to read the rules:
1) The nominations have been considered and narrowed down to ten (11... why 11? Because 10 was just not enough!) contestants.
2) Each reader of Visions of Ypsi is allowed one (1) vote.
3) Votes are to be posted in the comments section of this post. Votes sent via e-mail or as a Facebook post will be counted if I feel like it.
4) Giving people shit based on who they voted for is not only accepted, but encouraged.
5) All votes posted by 12:00 AM on New Years Eve will be counted.
6) Voting is closed @ 12:01 AM New Years Day.
7) Late nominations will be considered, but discouraged.
8) Those nominated but not included on this official ballot are not eligible for late nominations.
9) If a voter wishes to change his or her vote, she or he must petition the writers of Visions of Ypsi.
10) Anonymously posted votes will only be accepted if the writers of Visions of Ypsi are told who the person is who is voting anonymously. In other words, the post can be anonymous and I will protect his or her anonymity, but I want to know who is voting to ensure true single votes.
11) We @ Visions of Ypsi will only cast a vote to break a tie if said vote is necessary or if we don't like who won. If you don't like that, you can get your own Celebrity MILF of the Year Contest.
12) As always, nominees must not have been eligible last year so we're setting the cut-off dates @ August. Any celebrity to have given birth before 1 September 2009 is ineligible.

Heidi Samuel (née Klum):
This is her 2nd nomination, which suggests that Seal has been hittin' it! I wonder if they'll give this kid the scarification from which the 1st kid was spared.

Sarah Michelle Gellar:
For all the Buffy fans who couldn't stop nominating her, here's your favorite star of Beverly Hills Family Robinson all knocked up. If she wins, I'll watch the show... well, probably not.

Julie Chen:
As co-host of the CBS Early Show & of Big Brother, this nomination is the biggest thing she's accomplished in years. Her son, w/ CBS President Leslie Moonves, was born in September.

Ellen Pompeo:
When not sporting the Whole Foods bag, she apparently sporting a cup of decaf from Starbucks... along w/ starring on Grey's Anatomy, she LOVES to support the big chains that are working so hard to displace the small, local stores.

Gisele Bundchen:
Gisele is helping to raise the probability that someone whose name ends w/ "Chen" will win this year; of course, Julie Chen is countering that by being Julie Chen.

Amy Adams:
This happy exhibitionist has recovered from being dumped on "the Booze Cruise" well enough to go and get knocked up by some dude that isn't Jim Halpert.

Paula Patton:
Those of you who read her name & promptly asked, "Who is she?" can join the club. she is vaguely known for her role in Idelwild, but more importantly, the father is Robin Thicke... son of Alan Thicke... which makes this baby an honorary Seaver!

Adriana Lima:
This little Angel has been appearing in Victoria's Secret ads since 2000... including the sweet, sweet ad that featured Dylan. I hope the kid has a haggard face and grumbly voice! That's right folks, we referenced Dylan in the MILF contest... he is everywhere.

Sarah Chalke:
After her long stand as the weird looking chick on Scrubs, this Canuck played the weird looking chick who left Ted @ the alter on How I Met Your..... Her parents run an adoption agency in Vancouver helping to place Chinese babies into Canuck homes... very interesting!

Jenna Elfman:
Like Sarah Chalke, she appeared on Roseanne; also like Sarah Chalke, she is weird looking. But weird in a hotter kind of way. What's she doing now? Your guess is as good as mine. I think she might have a sit-com where she plays some older woman living w/ a bunch of younger guys or something like that. I may have her confused w/ someone else though.

Ashley Jensen:
She's on Ugly Betty now (if that's still on), but more importantly, she was on Extras w/ Ricky Gervais. If you haven't seen it, do yourself a favor... it's fantastic! Particularly the 1 w/ Ben Stiller & the 1 w/ Patrick Stewart. Her kid was born in October & is named Francis... after me perhaps?

Tiffani Thiessen:
This has-been was knocked up by her never-was, Brady Smith... you loved her on Saved by the Bell, you tolerated her on 90210, & now you can vote for her on Visions of Ypsi.

Friday, December 11, 2009

Holiday Post #4: Chanukah Post #1

Faithful readers may recall my previous attempts at composing holiday songs. Here's the 1st one: Here's a link to the 1 I wrote in 2007. I doesn't hold together as well as it could, but I'm no Irving Berlin. I'm also no Neil Diamond or Bob Dylan, but w/ all of these Jewish songwriters taking a turn @ X-Mas, I thought, since Chanukah starts tomorrow, it'd be a nice change of pace to go for a Chanukah tune. The canon is much smaller, & the Dreidel Song blows, but as it turns out, X-Mas tunes in the tradition of non-Christiancentric music are tough. I spent a while yesterday trying to do a little Klezmer thing, but I failed miserably. Instead, to celebrate tomorrow's start to Chanukah, check out this sweet video from The Klezmatics. With that in mind, I think I may settle for a Polka... Eastern European, but not of specifically Jewish origin. I haven't finished it yet... I'm still coming up w/ words that rhyme w/ thong.Speaking of Jewish X-Mas music, I finally got the new Dyaln CD. I have some mixed feelings about it. The review in Uncut suggested that it works neither as a Dylan album nor as a X-Mas album which is interesting & I tend to agree, but (Stephanie will completely disagree here) there is something that seems to work. He takes it more seriously that I expected, & he adds an interesting political tone to many of the songs. Particularly "Do You Hear What I Hear," "Santa Clause is Coming to Town," & "Must Be Santa." I would imagine it's only for the die-hard fans, but overall, I'm digging it. Another X-Mas album I've been liking lately is Hag's Christmas by Merle Haggard. Stephanie found it @ a garage sale last summer, but it was originally released in the early '70s. It's got all of his good blue-collar themes w/ a bit of the grungey under-belly that Dylan runs w/ on Christmas in the Heart. Of course, David Grisman's Acoustic Christmas is another 1 that is in high rotation right now... & he's another Jewish dude who released a X-Mas album. Perhaps we'd better enjoy some latkes & sufganiyah w/ our pierogies & sauerkraut tonight.
Happy Chanukah Y'all!
Oh... & keep the nominaitons coming. I will post the nominees next week.

Ellis, D

Friday, December 4, 2009

World Cup Post #1: The Draw

Group A: S. Africa, Mexico, Uruguay, France
France will go through as the top team w/ Mexico going through to the 2nd round as the 2nd team.

Group B: Argentina, S. Korea, Nigeria, Greece
Argentina is the obvious #1 team, but the 2nd could go in any direction. I'm pulling for Nigeria though.

Group C: England, USA, Algeria, Slovenia
I think England & USA will b 1 & 2, but the US could pull an upset here... then again, they could totally fuck up & watch Slovenia pass them by.

Group D: Germany, Australia, Ghana, Serbia
The Aussies are screwed. Both Ghana & Serbia could be the #2 team, & Germany is a lock for #1.

Group E: Netherlands, Japan, Cameroon, Denmark
The Dutch & the Danes will go through, but Cameroon could surprise people.

Group F: Italy, New Zealand, Paraguay, Slovakia
Italy has the easiest group; #2 could be any of these teams... none of whom will get past the 2nd round.

Group G: Brazil, Côte d'Ivoire, N. Korea, Portugal
Brazil will be #1, but #2 could go to Portugal or Côte d'Ivoire. I imagine people will assume Portugal will go through, but I have faith in The Elephants' ability to piss off Ronaldo & send him home in tears.

Group H: Spain, Switzerland, Chili, Honduras
Spain will go through w/ 3 wins, & then the Swiss will probably be the 2nd team.

Things could definitely be worse for France & the USA. That said, I imagine the USA will face Gerrmany in Round 2 & crash out of the competition right then & there. Many people in the British press are calling for an England v Brazil final, but the way I see it, it looks like they would meet up in the semis if England gets past France... which I don't see happening... & Brazil gets past the Dutch... which I don't see happening. I'm picking a France v Netherlands & a Germany v Spain semi-final. At that point it's up in the air. I'd prefer Brazil to Germany in the Semis, but it doesn't look like that's how it will play out. Of course, this is all based on my scattered reading of the brackets which might very well be flawed. Here's the Wikipedia way the brackets play out, so you can go through it yourself & correct my mistakes.

Holiday Post #3: I'm a Lumberjack & I'm OK

Faithful readers will be in no way surprised to learn that we're going to Ida, MI tomorrow to get a X-Mas tree. This will mark the 7th straight year we've gotten our tree from Matthes Evergreen Farm. The place is really great. Not only do I get to participate in the manly art of cutting down a tree, but we then get to participate in the manly art of browsing the Old Ladies' Country X-Mas Craft Area (that might not be the official name... I'll have to check). They also feature a stage where local musicians perform all afternoon in the main barn (where they (the Matthes people... not the performers) also serve Hot chocolate, coffee, & snacks. There's a hay-ride, pony rides, a petting zoo, & the "Wreath Shop" where they sell home made decorations... & where the kids see Santa. It's been the same Santa dude every year, & unfortunately, I think Solstice & Aiden still actually believe he's "the real deal." I've been dropping hints for years, but they're being really stubborn about it. Speaking of Santa, the Wikipedia link to Santa suggests that in Welsh he is referred to as Siôn Corn which translates as Chimney John... so there's a fun little fact for you. Never say Visions of Ypsi doesn't give back to its readers! We're also giving back to the readers by giving y'all this link to the Christmas in Ida Festival & Parade of Lights. Over the 7 years we've been going down there, we had no idea that they had this huge festival each year. It's happening tomorrow in downtown Ida, so maybe we'll see you there.And speaking of giving back, we're still accepting nominations for the Visions of Ypsi Celebrity MILF of the Year Contest. Next week, we'll compile a list of the nominees, post the mini-bios, & start the voting. The nominees so far include Sarah Michelle Gellar, Sarah Chalke, & Adriana Lima. Alessandra Ambrosio missed the cut-off by a week & Alyson Hannigan missed it by about 6 months.

Tuesday, December 1, 2009

Holiday Post # 2: The Thompson Building & The Nominations

Apparently, the city plans to tear down the remainder of the building. The entire story can be found @ The Ypsi Citizen, but I'll sum up here. They told Beal he had 90 day to make the structure permanently stable. When they sent him a letter this week to encourage the repairs, he claimed it had been done. They then said the scaffolding blocking lanes of both Cross St. & River St. is certainly not a permanent solution & are now going to file w/ the Circuit Court to get the go-ahead for demolition. Of course, in other Thompson Building news, no official cause for the fire has been released yet, but accelerants were found. No one seems to want to say that they believe Beal caused the fire, but it's pretty clear that the investigation is going in that direction. In non-Thompson Building news, start making your Visions of Ypsi Celebrity MILF of the Year Contest Nominations. The preferred nomination technique is to post your nominee here in the comments section. I will, however, accept e-mail submissions if you so desire.
As far as eligibility is concerned, the nominees need to have gotten knocked up in 2009 & they need to be famous. (Female celebrities who adopted in 2009 are also eligible, but we've seen in the past that those nominees cause a tad bit of controversy.) Celebrities whose babies were born this year are only eligible if the birth occurred after on or after September 1. This allows for shortened pregnancies, but in these cases, the pregnancies wouldn't have been known before the 1st of the year. Basically, we need to ensure people who were eligible last year aren't nominated this year for the same pregnancy. To get you started w/ the process, you can look through 9 potential nominees here (followed by 8 others who were eligible last year). Here is a link to a site full of rumors, but be sure the person is actually a 2009 MILF before nominating her. In closing, traffic @ Visions of Ypsi has been light lately, so if we don't get enough nominations, I'll nominate a few myself, but I would like to stay out of the process as much as possible. Oh, & to help get you in the MILFy holiday mood, you can revisit the Contest proceedings from previous years (2007 & 2008) here.