Thursday, May 31, 2007

Pirate Week Post #4 (Swashbucklers part 2)

Star Wars: The Empire Strikes Back 1980*: The second of the Star Wars films and the second sci/fi film on my list
Zorro the Gay Blade 1981: A fun little spoof with a gay Zorro
The Pirate Movie 1982: A shit-ass musical about pirates
Yellowbeard 1983: A not so funny spoof w/ some Pythons
The Meaning of Life 1983*: A funny as hell movie where the Pythons portray some accountants as pirates at war w/ other accountants.
Star Wars: Return of the Jedi 1983*: #3
Ice Pirates 1984: Space age pirates doing space age stuff.
The Goonies 1985*: Awesome!
Summer Rental 1985: John Candy teams up w/ a pirate/ seafood restaurant owner while on vacation in FLA.
The Princess Bride 1987*: A pirate and a princess fight a 6 fingered man and a total douchebag. It reunited Christopher Guest w/ Rob Reiner after their triumph w/ This is Spinal Tap.
Treasure Island 1990: Charleton Hesten as Long John Silver... from his cold, dead wooden leg.
Hook 1991: An interesting update to the Peter Pan story.
The Three Musketeers 1993*: The best version of this story featuring Tim Curry as the Cardinal played just like he played Frank-N-Furter.
Cutthroat Island 1995: An odd but not so good feminist update of the Captain Blood story.
Muppet Treasure Island 1996*: The only puppet based film on the list.
The Man in the Iron Mask 1998: The Musketeers are great but DiCaprio's job may be his worst ever.
The Mask of Zorro 1998*: The best Zorro movie ever, and it features Catherine Zeta Jones so it's got that going for it too.
Star Wars: The Phantom Menace 1999*: Important in terms of the saga, but kind of shitty.
The Count of Monte Cristo 2002: A really good remake w/ the guy who played Jesus in The Passion of the Christ.
Star Wars: Attack of the Clones 2002*: One of my favorites in the saga.
Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl 2003*: The main reason a list like this is necessary.
Mickey and the The Three Musketeers 2004: I'm not proud of this one... Mickey, Donald and Goofy as the musketeers.
The Legend of Zorro 2005: A shitty sequel to a really good movie.
Star Wars: Revenge of the Sith 2005*: Action, action, action with great sword fights.
Pirates 2006: The only XXX movie on the list. Janine is as hot as ever... and so are the sex scenes.
Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man’s Chest 2006*: A nice cliffhanger to bridge the story w/ the third film.
Pirates of the Caribbean: A World’s End 2007: See my review below.

3 comments:

Daye said...

I have the goonies on dvd--if ya need a fix

Anonymous said...

Janine is not wearing a practical pirate costume AT ALL!

Anonymous said...

Do you really think I care?